Friday, June 30th, 2000 Relief! What looked impossible from Oregon now looks possible, in fact, certain. Upali and I are adopting a child, a beautiful Sri Lankan child!
Yesterday was our first full day in Sri Lanka. After breakfast we take a bus to the US Embassy. In the lobby we meet a couple just finishing up their independent adoption. What luck! I pump them for information in the few minutes we have together. They are on the last step, interview for the child’s visa. My confidence is boosted. Anusha holds their one month old son and tells me not to worry about the three month’s rule for international adoption. More relief, as I begin to realize that things could indeed go quite quickly after all. We introduce ourselves to the staff and tell them about our adoption. More good news comes with the promise of the child’s visa being issued in the same week of application.
We call Captain Mary at the Salvation Army. We had called her from Oregon and she had promised to connect us with a girl. First letdown comes when she says she has no girls, only one boy, two weeks old, and would we like to meet him? We 3-wheel it over to The Haven and Sunshine House. Within minutes I am holding the boy. He seems too small for a two week old, too light. He doesn’t squeeze my finger when I place it in his palm (is that normal, I wonder, wishing I knew more about infant reflexes). I look in his face and my heart sinks.
I realize at that moment that my heart is blocked. My wish for a daughter is too strong to overcome, and I resolve to do everything we can to locate a girl before giving up and agreeing to a son. It is painful to face the feelings, for it seems selfish and immature to be so set in my preferences. I strive to overcome. Slow down, take it easy on yourself. When it comes down to it, I have to believe that I can love any child enough to finish the adoption. We thank her and leave.
Next stop is Soyza Maternity Hospital. We get no further than the front desk. I can hear the babies crying down the hallway. A man writes our name and phone number down in a small desk diary, on the January 12th page, the next clean page. We take their phone number. Call back in three days, we are told.
Last stop of the afternoon is the Hospital for Women. The three-wheel driver goes inside for an eternity and comes out with the director. Would a 3-year old boy be too old? A six-month girl? They have been sent to an orphanage, but perhaps they can be located again.
We call Nayakakanda in the evening. Sister Henrietta says the girl born May 9th, whom brother Lal had located for us, perhaps is not available after all, as the mother has changed her mind. Grandmother is due to arrive on Tuesday, and the mother will make her final decision. But how long are we staying in Sri Lanka? Perhaps she has another child that will do…
Pathma calls from Chilaw. There is a 6-month old girl in a hospital there. Maybe we can adopt her. Pathma will check on it and call us back.
Rohini calls from Mawanella. There is a 2-year old girl whose mother is a single parent and cannot afford her upkeep. Should she persue? Yes, we tell her, of course. Thank you.
We shall go to Lady Ridgefield House on Saturday. We shall locate a child, I am confident.
Tags: International Adoption, Sri Lanka
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Mar 12 2008